Common Name: Jubei-chan the Ninja Girl
Alternative Names: Juubee-chan: Lovely Gantai no Himitsu, Jubei-chan the Ninja Girl: Secret of the Lovely Eyepatch / Juubee-chan 2: Siberia Yagyuu no Gyakushuu, Jubei-chan 2: The Counterattack of Siberia Yagyu
Score: 4/10, 3/5
Length: 2 Seasons of 13 Episodes
Genre: Action, Comedy, Ecchi, Samurai, Martial Arts
Summary: Long have there been tales of samurai both mystical and silly. Out of all the various tales that have been passed down throughout history, though, few have been able to meet the near-mythical tales of Yagyu Jubei. This is the story of the legacy this samurai/ninja warrior left behind and the unfortunate circumstances that legacy has forced upon the young Nanohana Jiyu, a young and happy high school and the heir apparent of the Yagyu Jubei. More specifically, she has been named the successor of Jubei's "Lovely Eyepatch" which allows Jiyu to become Jubei reborn--possessing the samurai's skills as well as his dour personality while still retaining a part of her own personality. Considering how the eye patch transforms Jiyu into a totally different person, it figures that she'd want nothing to do with all that, content to be a normal, high school girl. Of course, Jiyu is given little choice when Jubei's ancient adversaries come to take vengeance on him and, by unwitting association, Jiyu.
Review: I'm going to be totally honest and admit that I don't remember much about this show. What I do remember, though, isn't very good. Like Gravitation before this, the story of Jubei-chan the Ninja Girl isn't exactly a flattering story to tell, but it is a good watermark to describe your average garbage anime from the late 90s--1999 to be exact. Full of parental love that borders on being creepy, gaggles of boys forming gangs just to ogle girls, and weird battles centered around some historically inaccurate and nonsensical McGuffin that the protagonist does not want but is forced to use anyway--these are some of the standard hallmarks of a bad anime back in the day.
And before you ask, yes, that last one, while specific, was a super common premise back then.
In fact, it's still pretty common since it was, after all, as commonplace
as "Let's make a JRPG spin-off series."
In this case, the weird battles are the standard samurai/ninja battles that can be only described as vaguely Japanese without properly representing either style of combat and the McGuffin is a heart-shaped eye patch that possesses the soul of Yagyu Jubei...because reasons. To be clear though, Yagyu Jubei is an actual samurai who existed during Japan's Edo period. While very little is known about the actual man, it can be said for certain that he did not, in fact, possess an eye patch that granted his renowned swordsmanship (which was a thing) to someone else, heart-shaped or otherwise. In other words, this show is utter nonsense and should be treated as such.
Granted, that should be a given for any story that involves a high school girl turning into a sword-catching
samurai master, gaining a foot in height, and a couple cup sizes too just because she puts on an eye patch.
Now, focusing back in on the story itself, there really isn't a lot to think about. The only real meat of the show is the introduction, where Nanohana Jiyu is confronted by a 300-year-old servant of the original Jubei who tries to force the eye patch on Jiyu, and the similarly 300-year-old grudge against Jubei that is now directed at Jiyu. Nearly everything else in the show is repetitive, comedic nonsense and Jiyu trying to get rid of the eye patch only to have someone she cares about threatened by one of the assassins sent after her, forcing her to put it on again. Apart from that initial intrigue and the story of how and why these assassins are after Jiyu in the first place, there really isn't much to talk about and, to be frank, even those parts aren't that interesting or logical. The broad strokes of this intrigue are that a man Jubei killed before he died himself has lived on over the past 300 years as a phantom grudge that takes control of various people to see his grudge satisfied. To end his foe once and for all, Jubei similarly became a phantom that is passed down the family line. Rather than seizing control of his host, though, he resides within an eye patch that only his descendants can use. Thus Jiyu is forced to fight against this grudge so that both phantoms might be dispelled. Like most revenge plots, there isn't much sense to the plot, particularly when you try to consider what the end game of this revenge/obligation plot is fulfilled. It's not like Jiyu then becomes this era's Jubei and I'm pretty sure the evil phantom had no plan after killing Jubei. As the story would follow, that would just be the end of Jubei's story.
Unfortunately, that's not actually the case.
For reasons that still boggle my mind, this shit got a second season that makes EVEN LESS sense than the original show. While it is implied that Jubei's soul is saved and has ascended to heaven, the second season returns with a new foe who wears a spade-shaped eye patch that is similar to the Lovely Eye Patch Jiyu used to become the reborn Jubei in season one. So, miracle of miracles, Jiyu is given the eye patch again and, for some reason, becomes Jubei reborn once more. Since it doesn't take brain surgery to figure this one out (just copious amounts of brain damage to consider it a good idea), I'll just come out and say it: the new eye patch-wearing assailant is--I shit you not--none other than Jubei's actual daughter, come back to life after being thawed out of a block of ice because of global warming. Distraught that her dad is dead and didn't trust her to, you know, not be dead, she sets out on a mission to claim the Lovely Eye Patch that should rightfully be hers using a "False" Jubei eye patch that grants her all of Jubei's skills, but none of his techniques. As it would figure, though, both Kiyu and Jubei's daughter do eventually decide to get along since another one of Jubei's old enemies has come knocking on Jiyu's door. Together they slay the final big bad and live happily ever after as a couple of semi-normal high schoolers.
The end, but for real this time.
Am I properly expressing how little I cared about this show once I learned of and watched the second season? To reiterate my earlier statement, I hardly remembered any of this; so much so that, while some of the broad strokes stuck out in my mind, I had refresh myself on a lot of the finer details of this show. Trust me when I say I really wish I hadn't, particularly when it comes to this show's brand of dated comedy and highly inappropriate ideas of romantic comedy. Let me put it this way: it wasn't a fun day when I had to remind myself that Jiyu's Dad is frequently beaten up by people who think he's stalking her. That is both concerning as a character gag and just not all that funny. Unfortunately, that kind of bored malaise permeates this show from start to finish. It's dull, idiotic, and doesn't offer anything that worthy of much note or critical analysis. The fight scenes are kinda fun, if jarring at times, but they at least made the show tolerable in the first season. By the second, however, I had already thrown in the towel when it came to interest--only bothering to watch the rest out of a completionist's sense of obligation rather than personal enjoyment. While I won't go so far as to brand it with a "Kill it With Fire" tag, Jubei-chan isn't something I could ever bring myself to recommend to anyone else. If you want something stupid to watch, I suppose you could do worse. Just keep in mind that you could definitely do better, not that I'll judge you either way.