Common Name: Juuni Taisen
Alternative Names: Zodiac War, Twelve War, 12 Wars, War of the Twelve
Score: 6/10, 2/5
Length: 12 Episodes
Genre: Action, Super Powers, Supernatural
Summary: Called to represent their noble mercenary families, 12 warriors are summoned every 12 years to participate in a proxy war known as the Juuni Taisen. Yet this is no standard war. With each participant possessing some supernatural or martial ability that allowed them to single-handedly dominate most mundane wars, giving each and every one of them a shot at victory and the grand prize of this battle royale. Though none of the warriors seem to know how the judges of the game are capable of this feat, it is understood that the last warrior will have a single wish granted, no matter how absurd, base, or detrimental that wish might be to the world at large. So, with their eyes on the prize the warriors of the boar, dog, chicken, monkey, sheep, horse, snake, dragon, rabbit, tiger, ox, and rat clans are primed for what will undoubtedly be a war for the ages. Everybody, clap your hands!
Review: To be frank, Juuni Taisen is something of a muddled mess for me. It is a thing that I appreciate and loathe at the same time. Yet, as always, the rationale behind those feelings is a tad complicated. So, allow me to start this review by trying to elaborate on those feelings it in a way that might be more understandable: Juuni Taisen is like a work of art. As I'm sure everyone reading this knows, most good pieces of art require two things from the artist: skill and personality. If an artist lacks skill, then they will never be able to see their vision realized. If a work of art lacks personality, a central and engaging feature in the work, then it is just one among millions that will never gain an audience. It is through the concert of these two requirements that truly memorable pieces are born in the world of art. But anime is an expression art in the way that the expression music can be as simple as a man playing guitar. While it might be gorgeous in its own right and in its own way, the true potential of the guitar isn't realized until it harmonizes with other expressions of music. In this same way, I'm inclined to consider Juuni Taisen a masterful work of art but it is also an absolutely god awful anime.
Mmmmm, yes. Just look at that quality art. Doesn't it just stir your emotions?
Put simply, Juuni Taisen's main claim to fame is its cinematic genius and its character designs. Following the concept of skill and personality, you can see why I'm inclined to consider this show a work of art. Anime is more than just those two things though. Cinematic skill does not infer the presence of a good story, and good character design does not necessarily equate to having good characters. Quite the opposite, in some cases. While I won't deny that Juuni Taisen is gorgeous to look at, there just isn't much substance to it past the artistry of it. The plot is functionally not there. The background and investment for all of this action, while present, is never really explained or rationalized outside of a single image and a scene that makes little sense in the long-run. Were this a character story, I'd be inclined to forgive those things but, honestly, the characters aren't much better. What little we learn about them usually comes from the stereotypical flashback of what led them to this point, instantly flagging them for death now that the audience has been given a reason some kind of reason to like them. Even then, though, I found little to no reason to care about these characters. Tending toward being either monstrous bastards or mild-mannered nobodies, there are very few characters I actually felt any amount of sympathy for when they finally kicked the bucket.
More than you know crazy, poisonous dog...man...thing.
In fact, the only real time I felt any amount of sympathy for some of these characters is at the very end of the show during what basically amounted to a winner's montage that highlighted the idea that these characters weren't as one-toned as I'd initially believed. Yet those revelations still lead to nothing, since the characters in question are already dead by that point. Their time in the sun already passed, even if it was one-toned and highly contrived. No matter how much I liked a couple of the characters there just wasn't any reason to grow attached to them when it was clear they were going to die in the episode that featured their monologue-ridden flashback or early into the next one. In the end, all of it basically amounts to nothing--worse than nothing in some cases. While it is frustrating that we fail to really get to know these colorful characters, I think the thing that bothered me the most though was the sheer amount of unexplained nonsense and red herrings present in this show.
Like, boy howdy, I would have loved to learn more about what all this nonsense was and if it ever
amounted to anything, because it sure felt like filler when all is said and done.
As much as I complain though, I acknowledge that everything in this show serves something of a higher ideal. Specifically, this show speaks to the existential nihilist idea that nothing in this world matters because nothing will change the cycle of all things, fate if you will, short of destroying everything tied to that cycle. In other words, it doesn't matter that we never got to really know these characters because they were always going to die. If not in this war, then one of the millions of other wars that will occur in their lifetime. If not in this Juuni Taisen, then the next one, or the one after that. It's even directly implied that the wishes of the warriors don't matter. From selfish requests to Wizard of Oz-esque desires to change and even world-shaking changes, it is all but stated that none of it will matter because the wish will come to nothing when that person passes away. All of this is, of course, reinforced by the show's central premise that all of this is just part of an endless cycle.
Too bad that cycle is used in the least creative way possible.
Long ago, it is said that a boar, dog, chicken, monkey, sheep, horse, snake, dragon, rabbit, tiger, ox, and rat took part in a great race, judged by the Jade Emperor, that would determine the order of China's calendar. This race is what ultimately determined the order of the Chinese zodiac. So, using that as the theme, we are introduced to the noble mercenary houses of those animals that, every 12 years, go through the same ordeal called the Juuni Taisen. Every 12 years, one member of each house is called. Every 12 years, a bloodbath between these warriors takes place. Every 12 years, one warrior walks away from the ordeal and has their wish granted. Then, since the cycle must go in, the tragedy will take place again and again and again. The fact that we focus on these 12 in particular means very little, since there have been and will be many more after them. While there are variations in how the game is played out, the result is still ultimately the same.
So, no matter who is fighting or how it plays out, none of it really means anything.
While the expression of that idea might be interesting in its own right, though, it doesn't necessarily make for a good show. Nihilism, as a theme, is always difficult to balance well, but will never really go anywhere unless there is optimism to create that balance. There needs to be hope for nihilism to have any meaning or impact, yet this show goes out of its way to invalidate and outright kill the few forces of hope present. All this does is kill any real investment in the show or its cast of characters I would have had, had it not already sealed their fate from the very beginning. Again, this kind of high-minded premise and theme might be interesting to analyze, the end result is just a bad show that offers nothing for an audience to engage with.
Series like Fate, Danganronpa, and Rokka no Yuusha are engaging specifically because they tackle the idea of this same nihilist/optimist dichotomy in a similar, cyclical format. These shows excel where Juuni Taisen does not because, while grim and dark throughout, there is also something of a glimmer of hope from the possibility that, even if the hero can't win, perhaps they can light the spark that will burn it all down. In the end, though, this show opts instead to piss on that idea of hope in favor of the winner making a selfish and utterly pointless wish that will all but seal their participation in the next Juuni Taisen. So, again, all of it really amounts to nothing and offers zero emotional payoff when all is said and done. That said, I simply can't recommend this show because of that. The action might be cool, but it drags on in points and amounts to nothing since the results are already decided at the start of the show. The art style might be eye-catching, but all it does is offer a kind of absurd fan service for everyone. The only real plus I have to offer this show is the music, which is solid throughout. Yet all those things mean nothing in the face of an absolutely nothing story with an uninteresting cast of characters. So, while I would love to rant about this show for hours with someone, I'm just gonna say you'd be better served watching something from that Fate franchise, which will be better in every conceivable way.